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Maybe you are a lifelong bachelor who doesn’t like to go out on dates. Or maybe you’ve been seeing one person who suddenly broke it off and you aren’t sure where to go next. Don’t worry! There are many ways to move on from where you are now to hopefully meeting a nice person who lives a block or two away from you.

Rituals are important

It’s one thing to go to a party and meet a new friend or business contact you’d like to keep in touch with. It’s another thing to go to a party and act like you’ve been doing it every night for the past three years.

When you first meet someone you’re interested in, it helps to form a little ritual. For example, when I meet a new guy at a party, I always compliment him on his shoes (a fact we can both agree on) and tell him I like his hair (which is true in this case). It’s a little small detail, but it’s very effective. If you don’t have any idea how to begin your introduction, or if your first meeting is with a someone you’ve been working with, it’s good to know a couple of things. You should try to meet someone socially at least once, but it’s especially important to work on your first date if you’re going out with someone you met at work or while volunteering for a charity. It will be a little easier to relax and open up if you have already been together for a while. You have already established that you like each other!

Think about the type of date you want to have: casual, dinner and a movie, lunch, drinks, happy hour, wine tasting, dancing, or an activity you can both enjoy.

Get creative

Use Google Maps, Yellow Pages, and your social networks to find out where fun events are happening where you live. These are the places you can start looking for dates. You’ll also want to keep tabs on cool things in your town, like breweries, craft distilleries, and cool galleries, to make sure you don’t miss an opportunity to meet someone else. If you and your friends aren’t always sure what to go to, browse neighborhood resources on Yelp, Foursquare, and the like to find out what is going on.

Dating Tip: Identify something that you and your date both enjoy, and take a picture of it together. If you are both into sports, you could show off your national

**_”When I made the_** **_mistake_** ** _of having sex with someone I didn’t_** **_love, I suffered an unfortunate set of_** **_pregnancy symptoms. I never knew_** **_I could go_** **_through the fifteen stages of grief._** **_Now I know the best thing I can do is to follow_** **_the law. As bad as it_** **_might feel, if I can’t legally marry the_** **_baby’s father, I don’t have to deal with it_** **_when I want to._** **_Thank goodness it’s not my child or_** **_I’d probably commit suicide._** **_I can’t even begin to tell_** **_him what happened, and I don’t_** **_want him to find out._** **_What do I do?_** **_There’s no easy answer.”_**

**Maggie, 28, Iowa**


**_Love it or leave it:_** Avoid having sex with someone you’re not really into. If you find that you’re into someone, then feel free to have sex with him or her. When a relationship is purely physical, it’s hard to fall in love with someone you’ve only just met (and vice versa).

**_Make sure:_** If you’re not in love, there’s no point in having sex with someone you’re not even remotely into—or, worse, don’t believe you’ll ever fall in love with.

**_Remember:_** When dating, try to look for things that you like in a potential partner. Do you like his laugh? What about his sense of humor? Does he have good table manners? Does he dress well? Does she care about you?


**_Chances are, you will be speaking to the man you want to date._** You’ll be trying to get to know him. When you learn about his hopes and dreams, fears and aspirations, it will really help you get to know him.

# • _Chapter 11_ •

# Talking about Future Children

Whether you’re married or just living together, talking about the future is a great way to get to know a person. The point isn

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